Baby’s Birth Day: November 16, 2015
What number baby was this for you? 4
Where did you deliver? New Orleans, LA
How did you deliver? C-section
How did your birth compare to your birth plan?
I did not have a birth plan. I was told that I could I could only have a C-section after having three previous C-sections.
What would you have changed or done differently?
I would have changed a lot of things differently with this birth, if I was given the option of having a v-bac with my previous births. I did not become educate on birthing until after I had my fourth child. After Brandon was born, life was different for me, and I became more aware of the business of birth. After Brandon was born, I was diagnosed with PPD, something I heard about but did not truly know about. So, I started my research on PPD how birth has a mental effect on women.
What did you love about this birth?
The birth was awful, but I love that I have a baby boy.
From The Birth Hour:
Christine had four C-sections. The first one was an emergency C-section and the rest were repeat. Christine’s first three children are girls and her last child is a boy. When Christine found out she was pregnant, she wasn’t happy. She just didn’t feel prepared. When Christine told her husband, he was thrilled. As time went on Christine began to enjoy her pregnancy and started to get ready for the changes in their home. When Christine and Brandon went to the doctor to find out the gender of their baby, the world came to a standstill. They found out they were having a baby boy. Brandon was super excited. He started talking about matching outfits, golf outing and playing football with his son. Christine was in shock. See, when Christine found out they were having a boy, it was around the time a black boy was shot in the back by a police officer. Christine’s anxiety went through the roof.
After baby Brandon was born, Christine did not bond with him. She was sad and had a very hard time holding him. Christine was ready to leave her kids and her husband because she was broken and had no idea of what was going on. Christine’s husband Brandon, recognized something was going on and took her to the doctor right away. Christine was diagnosed with Postpartum Depression.
At This Mama Wines, we want all mothers to understand that postpartum depression is real, to be equipped with the knowledge of symptoms and to know that it is okay to ask for help. Our goal is to share openly, and honestly, about our own journeys and why this forum is so important for all of us.
Why am I so sad? What is wrong with me? I don’t want to hold and kiss my baby… I must be loosing it! Why is everyone so happy? I must be really tired. Let me continue to post pictures online of my happy family so no one thinks anything is wrong with me… After already having three children, there is no way I could experience postpartum depression.
This was me not too long ago. I did not understand what was going on with me. I did not know that after already having three children, that I could experience the feelings that I felt. I was lost. I felt like I was alone. I did not know any other moms with the same feelings. Finally, at my breaking point, I called my doctor.
My doctor saved me. The conversation with my doctor was the best conversation that I had in a very long time. She let me know that I wasn’t alone. She told me that she has had many patients come to her with the exact same feelings.
But why isn’t anyone talking about this? Why are we moms afraid of letting the truth out about motherhood? Why do we feel pressured to be perfect and to raise perfect children?
Know that you are not alone!
Be aware of your body. Allow others to help you. Do not feel ashamed. Please.
It is time to let down the walls and support each other. Being a mom is not easy. Let us embrace this journey together.
Postpartum Depression Resources:
Christine is mom to four beautiful children and a dog and is married to the love of her life, Brandon. Christine is the founder of the blog This Mama Wines which is a community of moms that talks about the good and not so good in parenting. This Mama Wines also holds events such as Mompreneur Happy Hours, Mom Social Hours, Documentary Screenings and Mom Fitness hours, throughout New Orleans; and the blog will soon have events nationally. Connect with Christine at www.thismamawines.com.